Easter Keester?

 

Timeline

 

Understandable, Then Hysterical

 

Takes the Cake

 

May the Farce Be With You

 

This Week's Quote

Image:  Facebook

The Atlantic on Wednesday released the entire Signal chat among senior national security officials, showing that Defense Secretary Pete Hegseth provided the exact timings of warplane launches and when bombs would drop — before the men and women flying those attacks against Yemen’s Houthis this month on behalf of the United States were airborne.

Tara Copp

Source:  The Associated Press

War Whoops

Image by G.C. from Pixabay

It's come to light that recently top Trump officials, when discussing details of imminent plans to attack Houthi rebels in Yemen, included a journalist in their Signal group chat.

But her emails.

The Keystone Kops

Image by dcandau from Pixabay

Here's a whoops we all saw coming.

You'll recall that following the November election of openly transgender Rep. Sarah McBride, Rep. Nancy Mace raised a ruckus about trans women using female bathrooms at the U.S. Capitol. Speaker Mike Johnson then mandated that restroom access be determined solely by the gender assigned at birth.

It's taken a nanosecond for egg to land on Republican faces.

On Thursday, a male reporter saw Rep. Lauren Boebert "bursting out of the House Women's restroom during this afternoon's vote series." She complained to security of "a guy" in the bathroom. Boebert went to the House floor to round up Mace, and the matched pair of Dolores Umbridges stormed into the bathroom. Seconds later, they came back out and returned "quietly to the floor." 

Boebert later said, "I made an error regarding a mistaken identity. I apologized, learned a lesson, and it won’t happen again."

The hell it won't. As long as the self-appointed potty police are on patrol, this sort of thing will happen again and again, to everybody's embarrassment. Reportedly the duo thought the person was McBride herself. Imagine being that cisgender woman they confronted? Imagine being so hot to make political points by snagging a transgender offender that your eyesight deserts you?

I'd like to know whether the Un-dynamic Duo missed any votes while conducting this charade of a crusade. Actually, now that I think about it, this could be an effective method of keeping the reactionary pair from voting. We should arrange a constant stream of cisgender, androgynous women, both gay and straight, occupying the bathroom so that Boebert and Mace are always too absorbed with monitoring the stalls to cast any actual votes. 

Hey, they assigned themselves this task. Just because they screwed up royally, they can't stop now. America expects them to be conscientious commode cops. It's a tough job, but these two are clearly suited to spending their days perched outside the restroom, trying to deny entrance with crossed toilet brushes.

Um . . . JD?

 

Cashmere, On the Other Hand

 

Icing on the Cake

 

Mea Culpas

Image:  Facebook

Pope Francis apologized today for using an offensive Italian term describing gay men.

I guess this is the moment for me to confess that I once accidentally referred to the pontiff as "Poop Francis."

Points for Trying

 

This Week's Quote

Image by Venita Oberholster from Pixabay

I was 5 years old the first time I ever got onstage in front of an audience. My kindergarten class was putting on a Black History Month presentation for our parents, and I was given the part of Dr. Martin Luther King Jr. I wasn’t expected to learn the entire speech; all I had to do was say, “I am Martin Luther King and I have a dream.” However, what (nervously) came out of my mouth, in front of the entire auditorium, was, “I am Martin Luther King … and I have to pee.” First big laugh I’ve ever gotten.

Alex English

Source:  Vulture

Odd Advice

 

Breaking a Sweat

Image by Lewis Good from Pixabay

As I plodded away on an elliptical machine at the gym the other day, I sensed there was a woman a few machines over moving faster and smoother.

Okay, who doesn't?

Anyway, I got a look at her later, and tried to guess whether we were of similar age. Then I tried to figure out whether she was gay. Maybe if I hadn't been occupied with such absorbing questions, I'd have noticed sooner that she was walking straight into the men's locker room, and shouted a warning.

I didn't want to add to her embarrassment, so I made a point of not looking at her when she reemerged. I don't know if her face was beet red. If it was, I'll never get answers to my questions, because that woman will be joining a gym in a different county.

For Goodness' Sake

 

Anyone Surprised They Missed It?